Terminal Love
“It is terminal,” he said.
She felt her heart collapsing, and from the cracks of it, there streamed tears. She bit her lip and tried to blink them back, but the cracks would not seal.
I love you, was all she could think, and all it did was make the cracks wider.
I love you
Yet she didn’t even know him. Sure, she knew about him, but that wasn’t the same. She had watched from afar, like a guardian angel. She had laughed when he was happy and had mourned when he was sad; she had cheered when he found friends, and cried when they left him; she had sent hidden blessings his way, and warded off all the evil her little strength could. She had chosen to love him, even though she knew he would forever be too far away to care or even know.
Then she had heard about the illness, but no one seemed to know what was going on. She heard ‘cancer’ and shuddered at the thought. Still no one could answer her questions. One day, she decided to ask him.
“The doctors average from about 6 months to two years, but no more,” he said.
No matter how hard she tried now, Lina couldn’t stop the tears. They rolled down her face and dripped off in spurts as she was shaken by sobs. Oh why, oh why couldn’t she take his place, or make him better? Was there nothing? No hope? No . . . it was terminal. She would lose him. The world would lose him, and how would it survive. How . . . how could life go on?
“Oh, no no, shh,” he said, and his expression pleaded ‘don’t cry!’ as he wrapped his arms around her. She stood, still crying, but at the same time trying to show through her tears that it was him she felt it all for, not herself. A gentle sway like wind in the trees rocked them back and forth, and through his strong embrace, she felt the faintest tremor of a sob. No – now he was crying!
Silent and tearful they remained, stranger hearts united by a common grief. How could he leave this behind? How could she bear this parting? Both hearts ached for a little more time – a little more life. Perhaps this was the person they had been looking for all their lives?
“I promise,” she whispered, leaning back and looking deep into his eyes, “No matter what happens, you will never be alone.”
A year and a half later, he lay on his death-bed. Lina was driving from work to visit him, when she was caught in an accident. For eight hours, the doctors didn’t think she would make it. By the tenth, they knew there was no hope.
Slowly her bed was wheeled into his room and side-by-side they lay, weakly holding each other’s hands.
“I am here,” she whispered.
“I love you,” he said.
And they spoke no more.
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